Most unexpected line ever.
24 Jan 2012 1 Comment
This one time, at band camp?
…I’m not finishing that line.
SPEAKING of unexpected things. Once, years ago, we had this junk car. It was going to go to the crusher, so we decided to have a little fun with it. We took bats and smashed windows, dented the hood, et cetera et cetera. I was kicking the door, and I COULD NOT get the stupid dent to stay in it.
Kick! WHAM! …Pop.
Kick! WHAM! …Pop.
Most frustrating thing ever. Finally after I don’t know how many kicks, the door gave up. The dent didn’t pop out. I was so excited I started jumping up and down, waving my arms around and yelling “YAY!”
Suddenly, behind me, there was applause. I spun around to look and saw that some people had pulled up to the stop sign near the house and decided to stay and watch me kick the door. When I got it, they cheered for me. Ugh. I was so embarrassed. I can turn some really nice shades of red and I am pretty sure I hit every single one of them that day. Goodness. They drove off and I spent the rest of the day in hiding.
I handle unexpected things soo well, let me tell you.
Once I was watching… One of the um, … Dangit, what’s it called? Um…. Hrmmm. Final… FINAL DESTINATION! That’s it! One of the Final Destination movies, when somebody got squished. I was all by myself and it was a total surprise to me. I screamed, leapt from the couch and ran to the kitchen. Because in my head I’m 12, that’s why. I spent the rest of the movie peeking around the corner watching it from there. Me, a dork? NEVER! You probably shouldn’t ever watch even a really lame horror movie with me though. Not unless you feel like listening to me squeal every time something happens while I watch the movie from between my fingers because I’ve covered my face with my hands.
12, remember?
Anyway, I guess what I’m saying here is that I’m awesome with surprises. Surprise!
In case you didn’t notice, I have returned my two depressing posts and their comments to their original glory. I censor myself too much every day to do it on my blog too. Enjoy.
Jan 24, 2012 @ 09:20:53
I’ve gotten to the point that I assume, if I’m doing something goofy, I have an audience. In a way it’s reassuring. I mean, I’d hate for my fumbles and nonsense to go un-laughed at.